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Sunday, 27 September 2009

  • Currently
    Aion: The Tower of Eternity Collector Edition
    By NCSoft
    see related

    Vast - Pretty when you cry

    You're made of my rib oh baby
    You're made of my sin
    And I cant tell where your lust ends and where your love begins
    I didn't want to hurt you baby
    I didn't want to hurt you
    I didn't want to hurt you but you're pretty when you cry
    And the moon gives me permission and I enter through her eyes
    She's losing her virginity and all her will to compromise
    I didn't want to hurt you baby
    I didn't want to hurt you
    I didn't want to hurt you but you're pretty when you cry
    I didn't want to fuck you baby
    I didn't want to fuck you
    I didn't want to fuck you but you're pretty when you're mine
    I didn't really love you baby
    I didn't really love you
    I didn't really love you but I'm pretty when I lie
    You hurt me baby
    I hurt you baby
    (How can you do this to me now?)
    (How can you do this to me now?)
    If you knew how much I love you, you would run away
    (How can you do this to me now?)
    But when I treat you bad it always makes you want to stay
    (How can you do this to me now?)
    I didn't want to hurt you baby
    I didn't want to hurt you baby
    I didn't want to hurt you baby
    I didn't want to hurt you baby
    (How can you do this to me now?)
    (How can you do this to me now?)
    (How can you do this to me now?)
    (How can you do this to me now?)

Saturday, 08 August 2009

  • Decision Making

    I've always just opted for the easy way out. As long as I had something to rely on that was all I would need. The times I took my chances I was always met with misery.
    It would be ridiculous to know this fact and make the same mistakes again, right?

    I wish I had some idea as to what I should want or be.
    But I don't think that I'll ever know either of those things.

    I ALWAYS get what I want. It's a fact I have to live with. The horrible thing is, I don't really ever get things WHEN I want them. In that way it all seems rather like a cruel joke.

    Please give me another chance.

Monday, 29 June 2009

  • This melody will fade away and die

    Breathe me every time you close your eyes
    Taste me every time you cry
    This memory will fade away and die
    Just for today, breathe me and say goodbye

    How many times? How many times?
    Now I can't look you in the eye
    Now I can't look you in the eye
    How many times?! How many times?!
    Now I can't look you in the eye

    See me, in the eyes of another's child
    Turn away, when you see me walking by
    Once in a while
    This melody will fade away and die
    Just for today, breathe me and say goodbye

    How many times? How many times?
    Now I can't look you in the eye
    Now I can't look you in the eye
    How many times? How many times?
    Now I can't look you in the eye

    And I don't even want to try
    My my
    'Cause every word from you is a lie
    My my

    How many times? How many times?
    Now I can't look you in the eye
    Now I can't look you in the eye
    How many times? How many times?
    Now I can't look you in the eye


    This song has been stuck in my head a while now.

Friday, 12 June 2009

  • The movements were beautiful all in your ovaries

    :(

    I don't know who you were but I will always wonder.

    I know circumstances are never really ideal not for anything they're really not.

    I don't think things will ever really go back to 'normal'. Maybe things are never really normal. Not even at all.

    I never really felt like I thought I should but maybe no one does.

    It's funny to lose something you never really knew.

Thursday, 04 June 2009

  • The Never Ending Why

    I really have no idea who I am, who anyone thinks I am, or even who I want to be.

    I'm sure that this is a normal feeling to be totally at odds with oneself but now and then it overwhelms me and I just really wish someone would tell me what to feel. I have no idea how I feel about anything, it changes every day or even hour or minute. I never know what my opinion will be in time and so I try to never form any.

    It's absurd that anyone could think that they know me when I don't even know myself. Maybe you think you do but I'm sure everyone at some point realises that I am not who I seem and not worth the effort.

    I told them all, so many times.

    I told you, I fucking told you.

    I TOLD you I was no good.

    But no you choose to see the 'good' in me but you know what? No part of me is real. None of it. All of it is just games I play. I have favourite ways to act and fool on you for loving any of them.

    I don't think I'll ever know exactly who I am or  who I want to be, because I have no concept of knowing who the hell that might be.

    It's funny people don't believe me that I have no goals or hopes all I do is go along with whatever happens I just go with the flow and see where I end up. I've never made any real choice just taken the easy way out just to see what will happen. Some things you can't undo and I lost the only person I might have ever cared about. I'm not sure really but I know he loved who he thought I was and that was nice. It really was. And he seemed to understand me somehow even though he never knew me. No one does. I don't think anyone ever will.

    And I really, can't be bothered to care.

    About anything.

    But I still miss you

distancel

  • Visit distancel's Xanga Site
    • Name: Not Worth Knowing
    • Birthday: 2/19/1985
    • Gender: Female
    • Member Since: 5/16/2009

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About Me

  • Oh comely, I will be with you when you lose your breath chasing the only meaningful memory you thought you had left with some pretty bright and bubbly terrible scene that was doing her thing on your chest but oh comely, it isn't as pretty as you'd like to guess in your memory you're drunk on your awe, to me it doesn't mean anything at all. Oh comely, all of your friends are all letting you blow bristling and ugly, bursting with fruits falling out from the holes of some pretty bright and bubbly friend you could need to say comforting things in your ear but oh comely, there isn't such one friend that you could find here standing next to me he's only my enemy I'll crush him with everything I am.

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